Why some men have a dog and not a wife

[DANDYSSR]

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.
2. Dogs don’t notice if you call them by another dog’s name.
3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
4. A dog’s parents never visit.
5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
6. Dogs find you amusing when you’re drunk.
7. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
8. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, “If I died, would you get another dog?”
9. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.
10. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.
11. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don’t get mad. They just think it’s interesting.
12. If a dog leaves, it won’t take half of your stuff.

To test this theory:

Lock your wife and your dog in the garage for an hour. Then open it and see who’s happy to see you.

[MnMsToy]

Now Danny you did not lock your wife in the garage did you

[DOOPHUS]

Thankfully for Dan . . . Dayl never visits the forum.

! ! ! ! ! !

[Thumper]

or Dayl would be beating Dan with the dogs rawhide chew stick

[MrsDandySSR]

Au contraire, Doophus...here I am. And just where do you think Dan got that joke? Besides, we don't have a dog...

And how's your new friend Mac? Having fun?

[sangus]

Now, those were very funny. Thanks for the grins!

[Thumper]

Originally Posted by MrsDandySSR

Au contraire, Doophus...here I am. And just where do you think Dan got that joke? Besides, we don't have a dog...

And how's your new friend Mac? Having fun?

We have a new member! Hey Dayl!!!

[MrsDandySSR]

Hey, Deb! Glad to be here! Now I have a chance to know things like "wear BLING in Flagstaff"...a girl has to keep herself informed about the important stuff and I miss all the details while I'm locked in the garage for hours at a time (hee hee).

[Thumper]

Sounds like you really did need that chew stick to whack Dan in the head for not telling you Every once in a while there something good to read on the site other than the usual "how often do you check your tire pressure" crap

[DOOPHUS]

Originally Posted by MrsDandySSR

Au contraire, Doophus...here I am. And just where do you think Dan got that joke? Besides, we don't have a dog...

And how's your new friend Mac? Having fun?

WooHoo, Dayl . . . it's about time you joined The Peanut Gallery.

Mac is Mega- . . . it's so fast and smart is gives me a headache.

! ! ! ! ! !

[MrsDandySSR]

Originally Posted by Thumper

Sounds like you really did need that chew stick to whack Dan in the head for not telling you Every once in a while there something good to read on the site other than the usual "how often do you check your tire pressure" crap

Yeah--ya got one? (The chew stick, not the tire gauge--got one of those, but that would hurt!)

[MrsDandySSR]

Originally Posted by DOOPHUS

[COLOR="DarkRed"][B]WooHoo, Dayl . . . it's about time you joined The Peanut Gallery.

Mac is Mega- . . . it's so fast and smart is gives me a headache.

Yes--Dan has had entirely too much fun on this forum without me!

Glad you're enjoying (?) Mac. I have a friend who insists that computers are dumb in that they only do what you tell them to do, but I think that only applies to PCs. My Mac often teaches me new stuff, although sometimes that's just how NOT to do something! Well, take two Tylenol and rock on!

[LTs SSR]

AND it also works why woman have prefer to have dogs vs men...


1. Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.
2. Dogs miss you when you're gone.
3. You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.
4. Dogs don't criticize your friends.
5. Dogs are very direct about wanting to go out.
6. Dogs do not play games with you -- except fetch (and they never laugh at how you throw).
7. Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
8. You can train a dog and it will even get your newspaper.
9. Dogs are easy to buy for.
10. You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.
11. Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.
12. Dogs understand what 'no' means.
13. Dogs don't need therapy to deal with their problems.
14. Dogs are happy with whatever you feed them.
15. You can force a dog to take a bath.
16. Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.
17. Dogs don't borrow your credit cards or cellular phone.
18. Dogs don't weigh down your purse with their stuff.
19. Dogs don't play video games.
20. Dogs don't drink beer or watch football.