Dog School
A young farm lad from North Iowa goes off to college, but about 1/3 of the way through the semester, he has foolishly squandered away all of the money his parents gave him.
Then he gets an idea. He calls his daddy.
"Dad," he says, "you won't believe the wonders that modern education is coming up with! Why, they actually have a program here at Iowa State that will teach our dog Ole Blue how to talk!"
"That's absolutely amazing," his father says. "How do I get him in that program?"
"Just send him down here with $1,000" the boy says. "I'll get him
into the course."
So, his father sends the dog and the $1,000. About 2/3 way through the semester, the money runs out. The boy calls his father again.
"So how's Ole Blue doing, son," his father asks. ;
"Awesome, Dad, he's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just
won't believe this - they've had such good results with this program
that they've implemented a new one to teach the animals how to
READ!"
"READ," says his father, "No kidding! What do I have to do to get
him in that program?"
Just send $2,500, I'll get him in the class." His father sends the money.
The boy now has a problem. At the end of the year, his father
will find out that the dog can neither talk, nor read. So he shoots
the dog.
When he gets home at the end of the semester, his father is
all excited. "Where's Ole Blue? I just can't wait to see him talk
and read something!"
"Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning,
just before we left to drive home, Ole Blue was in the living room
kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal, like he
usually does. Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy
still messing' around with that little redhead who lives in town?'
The father says, "I hope you SHOT that son of a b#!@!! before he
talks to your Mother!"
"I sure did, Dad!"
"That's my boy!"
(The kid went on to be a successful lawyer)